Although Doris and James are not newcomers to St. Thomas, they are newcomers to North Charleston. They are not in the best of health, and it speaks volumes for the closeness of family that their son-in-law was first to suggest building an annex onto his and Diane's home as self-contained accommodation. The idea took flight, resulting in a well-designed, surprisingly spacious "Granny Flat"…or, to use the American translation, "In-law Apartment".
My knock on the door is answered by a smiling face and a welcoming hug, right away you feel at home, and Doris would have it no other way. We tour the apartment & the shaded patio; go out to look at the newly-created Memorial Garden; then admire the beginnings of the "North Forty"… a small vegetable garden designed especially for James to tend, good therapy as he learns to cope with the aftermath of a stroke.
After the tour, Doris, Diane and your journalist settle down to chat. James is visiting one of his daughters, so there's no need to worry about the interview process being too much of a strain on him.
Most of us are used to seeing Doris and James at the business end of large amounts of food, lovingly prepared for some St. Thomas event. Some years back, Father Dan 'christened' them "The Cooking Cokers", a name (and time) they cherish. Doris treasures his kind letter of appreciation written several years before.
So, who are the "Cooking Cokers"?…..Doris was the eldest child of seven born to Rose and Charles Shoe in Mooresville, North Carolina. Family life, made difficult by an introverted, loner-type father, was tempered by a very loving mum. Rose was filled with Christian love for all, instilling those qualities in her children, as evidenced by the fact that those still alive maintain a close, loving relationship.
Doris graduated from Monroe High School where she had excelled at Math, something that would later play an important part in her career.
In 1948, the family moved from Monroe to Charleston, and it was here that Doris met, and married her first husband, Wade Mims. Wade was in the Navy at the time, which meant that he and Doris led the usual nomadic, military life. During this time, Doris gave birth to a daughter, Diane. She later gave birth to another little girl who, very sadly, only lived for two days. Diane grew up as an only child, and perhaps that has played a part in the strong bond that exists between mother and daughter. Each draws great strength from the other.
In 1954, Wade and Doris settled in New York where there were better job opportunities. It was then that Doris went to Business School in New York, becoming skilled at IBM Data processing, and eventually going to work for the Sunshine Biscuit Co. The family lived in New York for 13 years, but in 1967 family matters caused them to move back to South Carolina. They moved to Goose Creek, Wade went to work for the Citadel and Doris put her business skills to work for Charleston County in the Data Processing department.
Time passed, Wade retired from his position as Supervisor for the Physical Plant at the Citadel. In 1995, Doris retired after 28 years with the county. Sadly, just two weeks after she retired, Wade died. Diane points out that she draws immense comfort from the fact that her father died knowing that all were at peace. She had been through an unsuccessful first marriage, been very unhappy, but had remarried very happily.
After Wade died, Doris eventually took on many extra projects to keep herself busy, one of which was to help one of her friends at special events at a Crowfield church. The friend had a brother, James whose wife had died. James came to a Young-at-Heart meeting at St. Thomas, and so his friendship with Doris began.
James Coker was born in Manning, South Carolina, only child of the marriage between William and Sally Coker. Sally was William's second wife, so although James was their only child, there were half brothers and sisters from the first marriage.
James came to live in Charleston in 1957, worked first as a carpenter, then going on to work for SCE&G, retiring from the latter in 1984.
James and his wife had three daughters, and were a close, loving family. After his wife died, James kept himself busy with his hobbies, especially woodworking and travel.
Since this article is about James and Doris together, we move forward to the time when they became friends through the church Y.A.H. function. They found they had a lot in common: they both like: travel, gardening and, of course, they love to cook. The more they got to know each other, the closer the friendship became. Doris recalls that when her first husband died, she had absolutely no thought of another marriage. She had always been independent, and had learnt to cope by herself; but, as she got to know James better, she realized that she was going to be blessed with a second good marriage.
Although James was a member of the Ashley River Baptist church, he began accompanying Doris to church at St. Thomas, eventually becoming confirmed into the Episcopal church.
On July 1, 2000, Doris Mims was married to James Coker, with Father Dan Messier officiating. Doris' Goose Creek home became their home, as they began their life together. Speaking of together: together they found themselves:
Parents of four girls
Grandparents of 5 children
Great-grandparents of 6 children
At first, there were a few understandable worries on the part of the girls regarding the second marriage, but time sorted all things out, James' daughters know that Doris loves their dad, and Doris' daughter and son-in-law are very fond of James.
James and Doris have done a lot of travelling together. When asked for a favorite place, Alaska is mentioned. Doris adds that James would really love to go back there, he has visited several times, but he is game for all adventures. He loves to meet new people. Doris would love to go to Hawaii, also Yellowstone, and she would love to go on a cruise. When asked what else there is she would like to do, she responds that a Hot Air Balloon trip would be nice.
Although James is very much restricted in what he can do since the stroke, one of his tasks is rolling the coins in the CPC Penny Jug. Have you noticed the Penny Jug as you come into church? You will find it in the Narthex, near the table which holds the elements, cross and tape player. James hopes you will remember to put your pennies into it each Sunday, it's for a very worthwhile cause.
Even though she continues to battle back pain problems, Doris continues to be a Eucharistic Minister, and is also a Lay Eucharistic Minister to Helen Box, who cherishes her ministry. Doris is still, of course, involved with Young-at-Heart, and, as you would expect, she and James love to visit people.
Towards the end of the interview, we talk a little more about Rose. It is obvious that Doris has inherited all her mother's caring qualities, and, in turn, she has passed those same qualities on to her daughter. Doris talks of Rose's very difficult life coping with Charles, how, after he died, the children rallied round their mum, finally able to make life as easy as possible for her. We look at Rose's picture and see the Christian love shining out of her eyes. I look at Doris and see the same love shining from her eyes. Diane mentioned earlier that Doris is constantly thinking ahead for others, and finds her greatest fulfillment helping others. Diane admires her because she never whines about her own condition, but is lovingly caring of James, always ready to be a support to Diane (who also suffers from ill health) and anyone else who needs her help.
We take a last wander through the ' Granny Flat' into the main house. Doris loves music and she points out her piano. Although she learned to play a long time ago, she hasn't played for some time. We wander through to say goodbye to Diane, who had left us to chat to a friend. We talk about how close the families are, and what a good thing the move to the flat has been for all. As we walk outside, I comment on the appealing walkway to their door, Doris immediately praises, and gives credit to, the architect, who is also one of the gentlemen who entertains the people at Young-at-Heart. As I take my leave, wishing Doris well for her then upcoming eye surgery (which, by the way, took place today & appears to have been successful), she doesn't dwell on herself, but speaks of keeping my husband (who had had surgery) in her prayers. Once again, I am touched by her thoughtful consideration.
This article doesn't begin to tell you all there is to know about James and Doris, but I hope it gives you some appreciation of this kind, caring couple…who are a joy to know, and treasured members of the St. Thomas family.